


Intimacy

by Theothermrsblankett



Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-28
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 20:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7328986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theothermrsblankett/pseuds/Theothermrsblankett
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All the intricate moments</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bath

**Author's Note:**

> Lesbian sex and intimacy is so often done wrong -- it puts women in ideal places with high buildups, perfect synchronization, and such. I am no expert at writing it, but I live it, so I want to play with these two and try to show their intimate life in an honest way. I hope that it is enjoyable, realistic, and if anything, calls to you and your lover.  
> (moved and edited from fanfiction)

“Do you like baths, Therese?” 

Therese froze in the shower as Carol’s voice ran through her, echoing across the white bathroom. That sneaky minx was always popping up and surprising Therese. She would have to start locking the door just to prevent herself from the heart palpitations that Carol had been causing since she moved in. 

“I’m sorry, darling, if I startled you.” Carol climbed in the shower behind her, wrapping her arms around her waist and then turning them both so that she was under the stream of steaming water. Neither one of them could see much, as Therese often opted to shower without a light on. She hated the bright lights invading her thinking space.  

“You took my hot water,” Therese said, but her breath was hitched and caught in the back of her throat from the feeling of Carol’s bare breasts against her back and her long fingers along her hips. 

“Sure did,” Carol smiled. “But seriously, Therese, are you a bath person? I’ve been craving a nice soak in this tub. Bubbles...candles, maybe?” 

Therese could only nod. Carol dropped a kiss to the top of her head, pulling her tighter against her. Therese let out a long sigh before turning to her. The shower was the only place that she wasn’t a foot shorter than Carol, since Carol was almost always in her shoes. Therese’s face fell above Carol’s breasts, leaving her just tall enough to lay her head in the crook of her neck.

“Why don't you let me wash my hair and go find some candles.”

Padding through the apartment, Therese looked for candles and matches and poured some drinks while she waited. It was surreal, she thought, to be here. The apartment still didn’t feel final to her. All of her things were moved in, her clothes unpacked; Carol even asked her to pick out some furnishings and decorations for the living and bedroom. Still, the place felt like a world from her dreams that could slip away as she reached consciousness. 

It was rather the same as Carol. Carol was this person who she felt and looked at, but at any moment, it felt as though she could wake up. Maybe though, that was exactly what falling in love was to feel like; as if everything could vanish, but every time it doesn’t you feel even more exhilarated.

Therese could hear the bath water running as she stood behind the door. She was content, holding two small flutes of champagne in one hand and a candle in the other. She watched the dim light flicker across the photographs she had taken, mostly of flowers and nature that Carol had insisted be hung in the bedroom. The candlelight cast shadows across each image, making them appear to be moving in gentle rhythms back and forth.

“You can come in now, Therese.” Carol’s low voice made her cheeks grow hot as she struggled to push the door open. 

Carol was in the tub already, bubbles covering the length of her body with steam rising up from the water and past her face. Her hair was pulled back, pinned in a loose french twist with blond wisps falling about her neck, some sticking with water. Much like the photos on the wall, the candle light from Therese’s candle flicked across her sleek skin and danced along her body. 

She set the candle down and handed Carol a glass. 

“Well… join me?” Carol looked at her expectantly, sliding down into the tub to rest her chin along the rim. Her eyelids hung seductively over the gray irises that reflected gold. She stared with such intensity that Therese, once again, lost her breath somewhere in the back of her throat, feeling bashful under her gaze. 

Inhaling, finally, Therese decided to start removing her robe. In slow, laborious movements, Therese peeled it off, trying to buy herself some time. It wasn’t meant to be an act of seduction, but Carol’s eyes were glazing over, unblinking, with a blonde eyebrow raising ever so slightly. 

When she finally stood there, naked, Therese’s eyes were focused on the floor as she walked toward the bath. She knew she would not be prepared for whatever Carol would do next. All she could do was curl her toes and try not to tremble. She was relieved, however, when Carol only offered her a hand and gently guided her down into the tub. 

It was certainly a tub built for two people to comfortably lay in, completely submerged in water. Therese was calmed by the streams of steam that created dew on her face and the goosebumps that has risen were settling down and sinking back into her skin the further she sunk into the tub. She was now in the happiest place she had never known. She sat with her back to Carol, between her legs, and as she settled in she found the entire length of their bodies were touching. Carol’s skin was slick and warm, her breasts soft against her shoulder blades. Those long fingers were blazing up and down her arms, dragging water droplets. With her head tilted back, she could see Carol’s jaw and neck, more water droplets sliding over the expanse of her delicate flesh. Her back fit perfectly to Carol’s abdomen creating an even more intense warmth.

Then she felt it. She followed the nerve connections that told her brain what parts of her body were feeling what. Along her tailbone she felt the warmest of all. Carol was pressed to her, soft hair tickling her skin and heat radiating through direct contact. Therese felt as if all the heat in her body then found her chest and face. The feeling of not being able to breathe returned and she stiffened. 

“Relax…” Carol whispered in her ear. She began rubbing her hands along Therese’s arms, into the muscle and then releasing, moving to her shoulders. She breathed deeply allowing Therese to take a deep breath as well until she let the tension from her body and concentrated on being there with Carol. She fell into a steady rhythm and let her eyes fall shut.

There was nothing more important than how safe she felt in that moment; not her job, her friends, her life. This feeling of security, of care, of love; this was what Therese craved and had always craved.

Carol, while content, seemed to have other cravings that afternoon. Those gentle hands were skimming beneath the water and over Therese’s stomach, spreading fire to her hips. A puff of air escaped her mouth like a puff from the smoke stack of a train. She lost her footing at the end of the bathtub, her feet squeaky along its smooth surface. Carol held her tight and settled her lips against Therese’s temple. Therese could feel the long drags of air Carol took in, as if she were smoking one of those cigarettes, sucking a long breath in and holding it a moment before letting it fall out. The her hips began to move and Therese felt her against her tailbone, the soft flesh there rubbing along her. Jelly was more useful than Therese’s legs. Her hands fell onto Carol’s thighs and she couldn’t help but curl her nails into Carol’s skin. 

“Touch me,” Carol whispered. 

Therese turned her head and felt Carol’s breath on her cheek. With water sloshing around her, and limbs failing to find comfortable positions, Therese managed to turn over and settle herself again between Carol’s legs. Bubbles were scattered across Carol, sparkling and twinkling as if she were the whole night sky. She sunk herself lower into the water and placed her elbow on the side. Bending her arm, she brought her delicate hand to her face and absently traced over her lips with her thumb. 

Therese couldn’t look away. There was something so magnetic about the way Carol looked at her. It made her stomach flip and flop madly inside of her, but no matter how crazy it made her feel, she could not avert her eyes. Carol was looking up at her, waiting, begging silently and Therese could barely move. Where was her camera when she needed it, she thought.

When Therese brought her lips down, Carol sank lower still into the water. Therese desperately searched with her hands for some way to brace herself, but came up short trying to get around Carol’s body. It was then that she heard the whimper. When their lips parted, a defeated sound left Carol’s throat. Carol opened her eyes, breathing heavy. Therese had never seen her look so desperate before. She fumbled, squeaking until she could anchor herself in place, before coming back to Carol’s face and hovering. Carol’s breath was shaky but her body was strong. She reached for Therese’s hand and guided in beneath the water, between their bodies. 

Therese was close enough to see her pupils dilate as she brushed her fingers across her. 

Candle wax was melting onto the ledge of the bathtub, spilling out in long sticky ribbons. The smell of lavender and Carol’s perfume hung heavy in the thick air coupled with the the rush of breaths from Carol’s mouth and the the slapping of water on porcelain.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes intimacy means letting someone take care of you physically.

Springtime is when life in New York turns its back on the cold air and awakens to the smell of hydrangeas and wet pavement. The cars will begin to shine again under fresh rainfall, and children will play outside and collect wild flowers to take back to their mothers. Most importantly, Carol will lay her fur coat to rest. 

 

Light was filtering through the high windows in the kitchen of the apartment as Therese watched Carol move about. She sashayed her way around, as usual, with a bit of pep in her step. She had pushed the windows open, inviting the spring breeze to drift in and catch the layers of her long skirt. 

Carol glanced her way, smiling but concerned. “You haven’t moved from that chair all morning.” She said it almost like it was a question. 

“Oh, I’m alright. Just a little tired.” 

Carol frowned and walked over to her anyway, bending down to brush her lips on her forehead. “You’re awfully warm,” she said. Carol eyed her, taking in the light blush on her cheeks and the way she avoided eye contact for more than a few seconds at a time. She waited for Therese to say something, but she didn’t. The comfortable silence became more awkward and she straightened herself out. 

She caught sight of the flower boxes outside of her window, chipped and lifeless. “You know, I think I’ll plant those window boxes today.” She swished back around the Therese. “Would you like to help?” 

Therese’s eyes grew wide and she froze. She was formulating an answer, caught off guard. “Well, I thought I might stay inside and work today… would that be alright?” 

“Oh sure, sure,” Carol said, amused. “Let me know if I can get you anything, alright?” 

Carol could play along. Did Therese know how obvious it was that she was sick? Her eyes were glassy, her forehead was hot, and her face was flushed. She shook her head. Therese had a lot of pride, and Carol obliged. 

She spent the afternoon wandering through a greenhouse downtown, picking out lovely spring flowers in pinks and yellows. She admired the soft, fuzzy bumblebee that was drinking nectar from a buttery daffodil. As it buzzed closer, she drifted away, minutely afraid of the creature that seemed to be following her and her floral skirt. She wished Therese were there to capture photos. 

With the back seat full of flowers, Carol made her way home with the windows open, driving slowly, hanging one arm out of the car so that the sun could warm it. It was a bittersweet moment for her. She hadn’t been out alone in a while, and while it was nice, she was beginning to find herself rather lonely. Thoughts of Rindy drifted into her mind. She was imagining her, running outside with her hair bouncing behind her, picking wildflowers and drinking tea from a tiny cup on the porch. Carol inhaled deeply. 

There was a corner store that caught Carol’s eye and she pulled into the parking lot. She knew that Therese would probably need some things at home. She smiled. Poor Therese was probably at home, pretending to work, while fighting of a fever. Carol picked up a bottle of medicine, some tissues, soups, and a magazine and checked out. 

 

“Therese? I’m home! I bought the most beautiful flowers today, you won’t believe-” Carol stopped. Therese was curled up on the couch, her nose red, her eyes watery. Carol leaned against the wall in the living room. 

“Carol,” she said. “I’m sick.” 

Carol tilted her head back, laughing. With a grand gesture and fake surprise she said, “Oh darling, I had no idea!” She walked closer to Therese setting the bag down beside them. 

“No, Carol, don’t. I don’t want you getting sick, I’m fine.”

“Nonsense.” Carol dismissed her ravings. 

“I’m disgusting,” said Therese. 

“Yes, well--”

“Carol!” 

“I’m teasing, only teasing. I don’t think you’re disgusting.” She tried to slide her hand through Therese’s hair but Therese pulled away. “You wouldn’t happen to want some soup, would you?” 

Therese’s eyes lit up for a moment, but then fell. “You’ve got to plant your flowers, I don’t want to be the reason you don’t do that today. I’m not so hungry, anyways.”

Carol looked at her for a moment, brushing her hand over Therese’s. She didn’t want to make Therese upset or make her feel like a burden, so she continued to play along. “Okay, I’ll go plant at least one box, and when I am done I will make us both supper. For now, rest.”

Therese nodded. 

Though she enjoyed herself, Carol was preoccupied with thoughts of Therese while she planted.  _ That silly girl,  _ she thought. Nonetheless, she stood back to admire her work and was thrilled. The window was alive once more, reflecting the honeyed and rosey colors of various flowers in the boxes below. She took a wrist to her forehead, dabbing at the light perspiration there.  

That’s when she caught Therese through the window, standing over the stove, wrapped in a blanket. She marched inside. 

“Therese,” she said flatly. 

Therese turned around. Her eyes were tired, sick. Carol shook her head as if disappointed. Therese was more guarded and stubborn than she ever knew. 

“Therese,” was all she said before taking the spoon from Therese’s hand. Therese just stood there, solemn. 

“Go on,” Carol said. 

Therese walked away. 

Tray in hand, Carol walked down the hall toward their bedroom. When she got there, the room was empty and she frowned. She continued down the hall and headed into their combined study. The steam from the soup was wafting up by her face, warm and savory, in front of her eyes as she came across Therese, snuggled up on the sofa. 

Carol set the tray down. 

“Why aren’t you in the bed?”

“I didn’t want to mess it up.” 

Carol tilted her head, drawing a hand to her neck. “Darling girl… Come on.” She outstretched her hand and Therese got up. Picking up the tray, she led Therese into the bedroom. She busied herself with pulling back covers, laying out magazines on the bedside table, fluffing pillows and arranging food and drink. 

Therese crawled in, avoiding Carol at all costs, but thanking her each time she pulled up blankets or arranged something to make her more comfortable. Carol set the bowl of soup in her lap and watched as Therese ate it willingly. 

“Not too hot?”

“No , no, Carol, thank you.” 

A few moments of silence passed while Therese ate. Carol consumed a cup of soup as well, looking out the window and occasionally at Therese. 

When Therese was finished, she mumbled another thank you, and Carol sat on the bed facing her. She pushed back a strand of hair on her face and then felt her forehead. 

“You’re still terribly warm, baby.” 

“I know.”

“What are you thinking?” 

Therese looked out the window, pausing for a moment. She looked back at Carol. “I just… I’m not good at this, being taken care of. My mother, well she… you know.” 

Therese had yet to give Carol much information about her family, though Carol asked whenever she had to opportunity. It was clear that her mother had never been around and it made sense why she acted like she was a burden for being sick. 

Carol pulled her into her arms, hands going across her back and holding her tight. She could feel Therese’s body relax in her embrace, inhaling through her mouth. 

“You are not a burden.” She pulled away, lifting Therese’s chin with her index finger. “Okay?” 

Therese smiled all the way to her eyes and leaned in, resting her forehead on Carol’s lips. “Carol?”

“Yes?”

Therese hesitated a moment but opened her mouth again. 

“I’m…  _ freezing. _ ” 

Carol laughed at her tone, thankful that she was finally asking for help. Immediately, Carol stripped herself of her gardening clothes and into pajamas. She climbed into bed, next to a chattering Therese who cuddled up next to her. 

“My goodness, you’re shaking.”

Carol pulled her tighter, bringing blankets up around them. Therese tried apologizing for her sniffling nose, for her fever sweat, for her breath. Carol only hushed her and changed the subject, whispering I love you into her ear. She was starting to sweat, trapped under all the blankets and pressed against Therese’s fevering body, but it was worth it. She held her tighter, rubbing her hands over her arms and waited for it to pass.            


	3. Insecurity

**_Insecurities_ **

“I never looked like that,” she said. Therese heard it, but was too distracted by the soft hands sliding over her skin, raising goosebumps in their wake. She could only gasp for air before Carol was there, brushing soft lips over her own. 

Now, months later, she contemplated it as they got ready for bed. Carol was standing in front of the mirror, staring ever so blankly at her reflection. She seemed to see right through herself, smearing thick moisturizer over her cheeks. 

_What makes a person like her so insecure_ , Therese thought. _You may have never looked like this, but I will never look like that._ Carol was, indeed, a beautiful woman. Therese watched the light bounce off of her moisturized face, her strong jaw and cheekbones casting beautiful shadows. Age has a way of toying with a woman’s mind and making her seem like her worth and beauty is somehow taken by the larger number on her birthday cards each year.

It was a fair assumption to make that the men in her life had called her beautiful, but not in a way that made Carol truly feel it. It seemed to Therese that perhaps Carol knew that what men saw on the surface, and in the moonlight when sex was always had in the dark, but didn’t want that.

Months ago she wouldn’t have understood, but it was starting to make sense.

Therese had witnessed such nuances in Carol’s behavior that made her stop and observe. There was the fussing with her hair and makeup before they went anywhere, the panic when she couldn’t find her compact before seeing Rindy and Harge, and that dreadful look of displeasure when she couldn’t fit into an article of clothing.

Therese had never dressed for men, or for the outside world, and she had never given much thought to what she looked like. She was different in that way, but she loved Carol and Carol’s eye for what “looked good”. She trusted her completely when they went shopping, only ever questioning Carol when she thought a garment was too expensive. Carol had such exquisite taste and grace, how could she not see that in herself, Therese wondered.

“Come to bed?” Therese begged.

Her trance vanished as Therese’s voice interrupted the silence. Slowly, she pulled her eyes away from the mirror and turned to Therese, a big smile pulling across her face.

“What?” Therese asked.

“You look so small in that big bed, all alone.”

Therese’s face turned a light shade of pink and her cheeks swelled with pride as she smiled. Carol walked toward the bed and slid in next to her, rolling over and pressing the back of her body onto Therese.

“It’s cold, don’t you think?” Carol asked. 

Therese slid down into the blankets behind her, letting her body mold and conform to the curves of Carol’s. Her skin and silk nightgown were cool to the touch and easy for Therese to slip her hands over. She let herself wander, trailing her fingers down the back of Carol’s neck, down to her shoulder and along the blade. Her hands flattened over the expanse of her back and sides. Cuddling closer, she wrapped an arm around Carol and laid her hand across her stomach.

“Don’t,” whispered. She drew Therese’s hand away and placed it on her hip instead.

“Carol?” Therese was brave. She heard Carol draw in a long breath before she rolled over onto her back. Therese looked down at her, propped up on an elbow, and brought a hand to her hair.

“Nothing, darling.” With that, Carol brought Therese’s face down to hers and kissed her on the mouth. She kept her lips there for the calmest eternity Therese had ever known before pulling away. Therese could feel and smell her fresh, warm breath and dipped down, kissing her back. When she felt Carol’s hand reach into her hair and tug, almost painfully, she knew that this wasn’t a good night kiss. She felt Carol’s legs moving, sliding over one another, her thighs pressing together and letting go.

Therese loved to watch when Carol was in the mood. Her insecurities weren’t the only things she left signs for. It always started with a pull of the hair. Then her legs would start moving and tensing. As if on queue, Carol left the last hint and deepened the kiss and let out a muted moan as their tongues met.

Therese was hot now. It happened every time. Her cheeks were burning with red heat that was expanding down to her chest. Her body beneath the covers was begging for cool air. It was nearly embarrassing as she thought about it, but Carol whimpering beneath her was more important.

Therese was a natural lover. Embarrassment and blushing aside, she was thrilled by loving Carol, and from what she could assume, she was pretty good at it. The things that came out of Carol’s mouth when they made love should have been the reason for her blushing.

Therese really wanted to test herself and try something new, though. So as Carol sat up and began unbuttoning Therese’s pajamas, Therese stopped her. Wordlessly, she pushed Carol back down onto her back, and kneeled beside her. She looked back, catching Carol’s pedicured toes and smooth calves exposed from the nightgown. She took her hand, tracing it along her leg and sliding under the barrier, feeling the muscles twitch beneath her touch. Her hand settled on Carol’s hip.

Carol sat up luxuriously slow, a thin strap falling and threatening to expose her left breast. She moved in and kissed Therese again. Therese allowed it, feeling herself go limp for a moment, overwhelmed with how Carol tasted a second time. She moved to slide both straps off of Carol and the whole nightgown fell to her waist. Carol fumbled slightly, trying to hold the kiss but also slide off the side of the bed in order to let the garment fall to the floor where it belonged. In the end, the kiss was broke, but her touch remained as she unbuttoned Therese’s night clothes.

There they both were, naked and looking into each other’s eyes. Carol, primally, pulled herself back onto the bed and landed on Therese, forcing her onto her back. Therese was conflicted. Carol was all over her, overloading her senses and when her mouth closed over her right breast, her heart raced and her hands shook. It took sheer determination to move from Carol and reverse the position.

Carol looked to her, wide eyed and dazed. 

“Let me love you,” Therese whispered.

Carol inhaled deeply, longingly.

Therese hadn’t gotten to look at Carol’s body like this since she had known her. The lamp light illuminated every inch of her. There were so many things to notice; the way her breasts fell to each side, the way her hips curved out, her stomach that was soft and curvier than her own, the golden curls between her legs that were neatly groomed and now glistening under the low light.

Carol’s hands laid across her body as if to hide it before she tried again to pull Therese down to her, but Therese gently pulled away. She kissed her forehead and started the journey that she was more than ready to take. She descended on her, drinking her skin from her neck to her breasts. Carol was quiet but for her hitched breathing and whispers of moans. When Therese finally touched her, her eyes fell shut and her lips parted. When Therese brought her mouth to the same place, Carol lost herself. Her chest heaved with heavy breaths and her back lifted from the bed. Sheets were balled in her hands, and yet she remained so quiet. 

Therese made as much use of her tongue as she could, feeling her way through Carol’s gasps and learning, really learning, where was best based on how hard Carol pulled her hair. She looked up over the hills and crests of Carol’s body, seeing the blonde hair that had fallen over her face and the light perspiration. Therese wanted to be brave again.

Bringing her hand back to Carol, she dipped a finger slowly into her. Therese had been apprehensive about doing what Carol had done for her a few times, not sure if she would be able to be as masterful as Carol seemed to be. But she did it none the less and watched as Carol bit her lip and opened her eyes.

There was a pleading in those grey, liquid orbs that Therese couldn’t ignore and the heat in her face came back full throttle. Staying inside of her, Therese moved up her body and laid half on her body, beginning to rock with her. Surprisingly, Therese thought, Carol held eye contact, and Therese could see an odd mix of confusion and delight flash in her eyes. She wanted to say something.

“Add another,” finally passed her lips. 

Therese gulped, her chest on fire, and she did. Carol’s eyes widened again. Faster and faster, Therese moved to keep up with Carol’s breathing, never breaking the gaze that they held, ignoring the numbing muscles in her forearm. 

“You’re beautiful, Carol.” Therese pressed on, harder.

Carol went dead silent, her breath catching in her throat, her mouth opening, her eyes opening further. Therese kept up, feeling Carol’s body quivering, but something else was happening; Carol’s eyes were filling up, looking glassy, and when her body went limp, the tears spilled out down her cheeks. Seconds later, Carol’s body shook again. She fell helplessly back onto the pillow with her eyes shut.

Therese panicked. “Carol… oh god, I hurt you.” 

She shook her head. Her eyes opened again with a look Therese had never seen in her before. 

“Thank you,” Carol whimpered. Tears poured in heavy salty tracks all down the sides of her face, soaking the hair at the nape of her neck. “Thank you, Therese.”

Therese pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Silently, Carol cried.  

Therese was drifting between sleep and wake when she heard Carol say, “No one’s ever loved me like that.”

Therese held her tighter.  “You are so beautiful, Carol.” 


	4. Motherhood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Carol voice* Merry Christmas.

**_Motherhood_  **

Carol’s nervousness was incredible for Therese to witness. It pulled at her heart, but she didn’t dare go near her. Carol couldn’t seem to sit still, and yet she was completely silent. She would pop in and out of rooms unannounced, and then float back out like a ghost. 

The night before, she had talked to Therese with an honesty that was refreshing. She expressed her fears, her concerns, and even her excitement. When the sun rose, though, Carol was quiet and steered clear of Therese. She had cleaned obsessively all morning and spent a long time getting ready. There was no music, no television, and no conversation. When the doorbell finally rang, Therese crept down the hall into their bedroom and waited. 

“Mommy!” She heard Rindy yell the moment their front door opened. Then Carol’s voice rang out and Therese knew she was lifting up Rindy and holding her close. Then there was Harge. His footsteps seemed to thump slowly into the apartment. The heavy footfalls sounded so unusual against their wood floor. There was only ever the tapping of women’s heels or the padding of bare feet. 

“It’s nice, Carol.” Therese could hear the insincerity in Harge’s voice. She could picture his furrowed eyebrows and skeptical gaze. 

“Thank you,” Carol said. 

Carol continued to chat with Rindy and Therese listened closely for Harge’s parting words. When the door shut, she let go of her shoulders and breathed. She left the bedroom.

Carol was standing at their kitchen counter, leaning between Rindy’s short legs that just barely hung off the edge. She looked up at Therese. 

Rindy’s little head whipped around and locked eyes with Therese. She started, but leaned into Carol and rested her forehead on her mother’s chin. 

“Rindy, you remember Therese, don’t you angel?” Rindy nodded against Carol and she kissed her forehead. 

Therese walked forward and extended her hand to the child. “It’s nice to see you again, Rindy.” 

Rindy slid under Carol’s chin, getting closer to her chest, but extended her little hand to meet Therese and gave it a squeeze. 

“It’s nice to see you too,” Rindy said. 

Therese could feel Carol looking at her and she interacted with Rindy. 

“Mommy?” Rindy looked up at her her with a sudden smile and all at once the quiet meeting was over. 

“What are we going to do today?” 

Carol smiled wide. “Well sweet pea, whatever you want to do. You’ve still got all your christmas presents here, there’s television, and your coloring book.” 

Rindy thought about it for a minute. She looked up at Carol, and then pulled down her head, bringing her little lips to her mother’s ear. She whispered.

Therese watched as Carol closed her eyes, seeming to be lost in the feeling of being so close to her daughter for the first time in months. As Rindy whispered, Carol smiled and Therese was sure that that was a smile she wanted to stay forever. 

Letting out a laugh, Carol pulled away and kissed Rindy’s cheek. “Oh I have no doubt that Therese likes to, shall we ask her?” Rindy nodded. 

“Therese, are you by any chance in to coloring?” 

Therese smiled. “I am, actually.” 

The trio found themselves on the floor, shoeless and on their bellies, with crayons in their hands. Therese learned that as quiet as Rindy was, she had an easy sense of humor that no doubt had been influenced by Carol, but the way she delivered her lines was very much Abby. All of those afternoons together, Therese thought, had no doubt formed this little girl’s existence. This didn’t upset Therese, either. It was the most endearing part about Rindy; she was so much the women around her. Maybe one day Rindy would reflect a little bit of Therese as well. 

“Mommy, you’ve stopped coloring. Are you bored or something?” There was the Abby snark that Therese was thinking about. 

“No no, snowflake, I am just enjoying watching you.” 

“You’re silly,” Rindy said, very seriously. 

Carol, on her hands and knees crawled towards Rindy. “Is that right?” Carol’s eyes narrowed. Rindy was starting to giggle, preparing herself to back away from her mother. Carol crawled slowly, her eyes shining. “Is that what you think, little one? That I’m... _ silly? _ ” 

Therese had never seen Carol so playful before. It was always hard to imagine adults baby talking or playing until someone was to actually witness it first hand. It wasn’t out of place, but it was something Therese had never been able to see before. 

“Yes, I think you’re silly,” Rindy teased. 

Carol launched forward, tickling Rindy as she squealed and begged her to stop. Little arms and legs moved in every direction but the little peanut was no match for her mother. Carol buried her face in Rindy’s neck, laughing herself until she finally let up to let Rindy breathe. Propping herself on one elbow, she snuggled Rindy. 

“You know who’s the silliest, Rindy?” 

“Who, Mommy?” 

“Therese.”

Rindy looked at Therese again and leaned into her mother with a smile.

“Why?” She whispered. 

Therese waited for it. Carol’s eyes glimmered. 

“She watched me tickle you and she didn’t even try to save you.”

Rindy’s eyes moved towards Therese, meeting her head on.

“But the truth, Rindy, is that Therese is the most ticklish.” Carol leaned in to whisper something to Rindy and then the two of them, nose to nose, nodded at each other. 

Two Aird women, up to no good. It was two against one and whatever was going to happen, Therese was sure she was going to lose. 

Winking at Rindy, Carol moved to sit next to Therese. She tensed up instinctively and gave Carol a sideways glance.

“Hi, Carol.” 

“Oh, don’t mind me. I’m just going to watch you color now.” 

Rindy was trying hard not to giggle but Therese acted like she knew nothing. It was then, caught in her head between how sweet Rindy’s round cheeks were and how close Carol was that she found herself with her hands behind her back and Carol saying, “Now!”

Tiny little hands found her tummy and tickled her senseless while both Carol and Rindy laughed and teased until Therese surrendered her body and they let go. 

She could feel the static in her hair causing it to stick up and tears streamed down her face from laughing so hard. The last time she had laughed so hard she was sure was in the car with Carol over their Christmas journey. She and Carol could share a look about something they noticed and bring themselves to tears simply for being on the same train of ridiculous thought. This was even more refreshing, more innocent, and more therapeutic than Therese could have ever known. 

It was also significant in that rindy seemed to trust Therese after that moment. The little girl would flow down next to Therese or on her lap and liked to ask questions about her and what she does. Therese finally felt like a part of Carol’s life that she had been secluded from was now accessible. She wanted Rindy, no matter what their relationship, to always feel safe in her presence and to talk to her and share with her.

She was standing now with her camera, sneaking around the corner of the hallway to find Carol and Rindy looking out the window at the birds. The warm weather had brought them all back and Rindy was teaching her mom all about the finches that liked to sit on the windowsill. Therese snapped a picture. 

Carol and Rindy whipped their heads around at the sound of the camera. 

“What are you doing?” Rindy asked. 

Therese walked forward into the kitchen. “Well, you and Mommy look so pretty together so I took a picture, is that alright?” 

Rindy nodded. “Can we take another one?”

Therese put her camera into position and watched as Carol bent her head down next to Rindy’s. 

Then Rindy wanted wanted one of herself and Therese. Carol had smiled at Therese when Rindy asked and she jumped for the camera. She took three pictures before she let them stop posing. 

“Well,” Carol started, “I think I’ll make lunch.” 

 

Rindy and Therese sat at the bar and watched Carol prepare grilled sandwiches and soup. They both asked to help but as usual, Carol was determined to do it all herself and moved about the kitchen effortlessly to do so. 

Therese snapped a picture. 

“Mommy is really pretty,” said Rindy. 

“She is, isn’t she?” Therese smiled. 

“You know, I can hear both of you.” Carol never looked up from her pot, but Therese could see her lip pulling up at the corner. 

“You’re pretty, Mommy!” Rindy laughed. 

“You’re prettiest, snowflake.” 

Therese snapped another picture, capturing Carol as she turned to wink at Rindy. Rindy looked at Therese, eyeing the camera curiously as Carol set down their food. 

As they ate, Therese noticed Rindy, still staring at the camera, kicking her foot against the bar as she munched on her sandwich. When they finished, Therese cleaned both of their hands while Carol filled the sink. The three of them then flopped onto sofas in the living room. 

The hazy afternoon sun combined with full bellies made them slightly drowsy and they all remained quiet. Carol sat with Rindy in her lap for a while, playing with her hair until Therese called her over. 

Rindy sat right next to her and slid her back down the sofa, just like Therese had done. She leaned her head on Therese’s. 

“Hi,” she said. 

“Hi,” Therese replied. She was fiddling with her camera on her lap. Rindy looked at it again. 

Across from them, Carol was twirling her own hair, staring out the window. She was lost in thought somewhere. She looked beautiful.

“Rindy, would you like to take a picture?” Therese whispered. 

Rindy sat up slowly and looked at Therese. “Mommy told me not to touch your camera because,” she put on her grown up voice to imitate Carol, “ I’m not old enough and if I break it Therese will be sad.” 

“Well,” Therese began, “so long as you’re careful I think you can do it.” 

Rindy smiled and whispered. “I will be, I promise.” 

Therese patted her lap and Rindy hopped on. Therese showed her the button to take the picture and how to focus, holding it up to her eyes to show her how what a blurry lense or clear lense looked like. She passed off the camera to Rindy, telling her to aim it at her mother. 

“Is it clear?”

“Mmhmm.” 

“Good, now press the button.” 

The shutter snapped and Therese could feel Rindy wiggle with excitement. Carol turned around. 

“Again?” Her eyes caught Rindy. “Now, Rindy I told you not to do that.” 

Therese gave her a look and she stopped. “It’s okay, Carol. She’s being careful. I don’t mind really.” 

Carol nodded. “Alright, well take a picture of something else then or that whole roll will be of me.”

Through coaxing, Carol couldn’t resist Rindy who begged her to pose like a movie star until she did. Rindy had turned their living room into a photo shoot, looking at Therese with serious eyes, asking which angle she thought was best. Therese, on her knees behind rindy, guided her as they looked through the lense cheek to cheek. The two of them had Carol laughing and posing. Therese couldn’t wait to develop them. 

#

When all was said and done, and Rindy went home, Carol was calmer than ever before. She didn’t cry when Rindy left, though Therese could see how glassy her eyes were when Harge and his car pulled away. But Rindy had raved about her afternoon to her Harge and he said she could come back in a week. Carol was relieved.

They sat in bed now, their feet touching beneath the covers as they laid side by side. They were exhausted. Therese turned to look at Carol whose face was content. She had seen Caol with rindy before and had always thought her an amazing mother, but she was still amazed with how well she handled her daughter and how well they got on. She envied Rindy for a moment, wishing that she had a mother so devoted. 

“What?” Carol was looking at her now, an eyebrow arched. 

“Nothing. You’re just amazing. And so is Rindy.”

“She really is.” Carol thought for a moment. “She’s got such a personality and I swear I hear Abby in there somewhere.”

“I do too,” Therese said. “She has Harge’s angry face, though.” 

They both shared a chuckle. 

Therese sighed. “She’s got the best parts of her parents.” 

“Yes,” said Carol. “All three of them.” 

Carol’s lips were on hers for the first time that day and Therese pulled her closer.    


End file.
